just before i go on about my day...
is it something i'll regret?
do i want what i can't get?
i'm just too scared to move
'cause i'm a fucking boy...
i've never sweared so much
not once in my life.
not even when i was the real vulgar person i used to be (not a pretty sight =/)
fuck everything
fuck school
fuck results
fuck cultural mapping shit
fuck barcelona
fuck eto'o and beletti
NO-fuck sol campbell
fuck life!
fuck filling up stupid forms
fuck money
fuck calculations
NO-fuck arsenal fc though (i love my shoebag)
if this is poison to your eyes, FUCK YOU.
ok now that i've got everything off my chest (rather all the fucks), let me go on about the not-so-fucking day
hawhaw had piano in the morning, dragged for an extra half hour, met teh class people at scotts where we had lunch. shared a meat lovers pizza with long. wonder if it's "meat-lovers" pizza or meat "lovers pizza" ! HAHA. sorry long, they match-made me with you. HAHAHA. but i am definitely not gonna be the blonde in the red dress. NOT me. you'll fit in just perfectly though XD
hmm we joined teh dudezxxorz for LAN at paradiz, where it was pretty funny. HAWHAW tan wei linh...
well beats tan ngee tiang hands down... before you go on about hands, drop the idea.
anyway, watched 'over the hedge'...quite a lame movie but nonetheless pretty ok. one of those movies parents will take their little kids to watch...the family-orientated kind of movie, you get it?
CARTOON LAH.
and then we kinda went off after that, while i stoned in HMV and listened to the ENTIRE yellowcard album. the new one, of course. it's really not bad, for a weird punk rock band with a violinist in it.
now i'm stoning at home, wondering what went wrong...
was it me? probably.
my fault? highly possible.
the most regretful? me, definitely.
suffering in silence? without a doubt.
whether it's still in silence, i don't know.
I NEED TO SCREAM. i need to scream now. i hope the neighbours don't complain. i need to vent the frustrations on the soccer ball. sorry neighbours.
a few kicks later...
still frustrated? uh-huh.
pissed? with myself.
angry? who else but myself? (i'm not an emo kid.)
solution? some things are better left unsaid.
possibility of success? one in a million, after rounding up.
the music...it helps? hell, no.
my leg is a f-ing bloody mess. wash my leg? not a chance. thanks sister for locking the toilet. great, have to drag my bloody leg downstairs. literally. no thanks to bad fall and awkward landing.
so, feeling better? f, no.
even with the blood included? f, i said no.
kick the balls? won't work.
throwing up? didn't work.
headbanging? f, i can't find the heavy metal rock.
hide in the closet? damn, it's filled with shit that doesn't even belong to me.
shred on the guitar? i'll probably end up with TWO guitars.
watch saturday night live videos? i'll end up with my laptop monitor and keyboard as two different parts.
hmm. any more solutions?
some promise i made eliminated one of the few that actually worked.
i don't know, but when there's a will, there's a way, no? (:
i feel sick, and i like it.
should i bite my tongue,
till blood soaks my shirt?
we'll never fall apart,
tell my why this hurts,
so much.